Third Person

“Third person”
Are you that person?
When people refer to you as the third person or mistress,
How does that make you feel?
Does it bother you?
Or is it just another cock you sucked for the day?

They are in love.
Vows were exchanged,
They said “I do”

Relationships are not perfect.
I’m sure you know that.
Bumps and bruises, that’s what makes them stronger.
Stop throwing yourself at him.

Families are involved.
Try to care.
Do you even know what you are destroying?

Feelings, do you have them?
Do you even know her?
What she’s going through.

What if you are in her position someday?
How would you react then?
She’s a girl just like you. Remember that.
Sensitive and hopeful.
She has started to build her life,
One by one her dreams are coming true.
Don’t envy her, try to wish her well.
And one day your dreams will also come true.
So let him be, let them live their life in peace.
Just remember,
Being the third person, will not do you any good…

Strangers with memories

torn-apartA wolf dressed in sheep’s skin.
That’s who you are now.
So much darkness within you,
I wish you were dead.
There’s no room for forgiveness,
And will not consider forgiving you, forever!
You have scarred me for life.
In my head, I’m hunting you,
Getting ready to put you down in the most brutal way!

I Scream silently inside head.

You have cut me deep.
Signalized me among our own friends.
A hypocrite! That’s what you are.
A pretender at Sunday mass!
Standing proud yet wicked,
Making sure you are the boss and ahead of everyone.
That’s how you want things to flow.
Mentally and emotionally you used me,
And then threw me as if I was a piece of garbage.
I was your friend.
For the sake of popularity, you scarified me.
You scarified our friendship.
I got no regard for you anymore.
What you have built throughout these years,
Are on pretend foundation,
Eventually you will tire after holding on to such a heavy load.
I hope it’s all worth it because we are not friends anymore,
Just strangers, with memories…

Barely holding on

I realized that I am the biggest hypocrite of them all.
I tell everyone to keep holding on,
That there’s light at the end of the tunnel,
And that everything gets better as long as you continue to wait, patiently.
I keep telling people to have hope.
That they need to keep trying because it is too early to give up,
And that they have so much to live for.
Then there is me,
I am barely holding on.

A run through the park

Tall trees and a narrow brick path,
I’m at the park at dusk.
Not a soul at sight,
Regardlessly, I continued my run down the brick path.
I felt as if the path is becoming longer and longer,
And a sudden feeling of being watched.
Chilly wind brushing against my sweaty body,
I could hear my own palpitations.
Feeling of being watched is getting stronger by the second.
I looked back; a tall figure was spotted,
Hidden among the tall trees,
I start to run faster towards the street lights.
Finally,
I’m in front of the city hall, and a matter of crossing the street.
Not a single soul to be spotted yet I was feeling safe.
Across the road I stood, forgotten what I was running from.
I was mesmerized by the city hall.
Felt as if the city hall was inviting me in.
As I took a step forward,
A team of black horses was running on the streets out of nowhere.
I took a final look around,
Except for the black horses, there was none.
Gently made my way through the horses and towards the city hall, Opening its large wooden doors.
As I walked in, doors closed behind me.
And that’s all I could remember…

Little white lies

I envy the new girl at your work place
She’s an achiever just like you
Beauty and brains all compacted in one
Ahead of me in every way
Where do I stand compared to her?
“Little white lies” keep piling up
You say it’s to protect me
But it bothers me even more
Are you really protecting me?
Situation is messing with my head
Twist and turns
Anxiety and over thinking
Has paranoia found me once again?
I get more agitated and restless each passing day
Where do I stand compared to her?
Not knowing if I’m being promoted or demoted?
Girlfriend or detective?
What’s my role?
Why must I go through this situation repeatedly?
Where do I stand compared to her?

Gone

To a faraway land you have drifted.
Difficulty I swallow the pain.
Between uncertainties I stood still,
As a result you drifted away.
My suspension took the best of us.
No more you and I.
As I suck up my heart ache,
I smile hard and strong,
Looking at the could have, should have, and would haves.
It’s too late now,
You’re gone.
Curled up and crying in the darkness,
I’m Sulking!
Looking at you, smiling bright and happy.
I lost the beautiful you.
Happiness has dawned in your life
But your happiness is pinching me to death.

Cracked Friendship

107828dl4rsiffxjBetty and Lucy have been Best of Friends for more than 35 year. Both are successful in their own field of expertise and came from aristocrat families. Betty has been busy getting ready for her companies 25th anniversary. While she was at Lucy’s last Saturday she had asked one of her helpers to prepare her some caramel toffees for the celebrations and she agreed. Same evening she delivered all the necessary ingredients for the preparation of the toffees. But she forgot to mention Lucy about the preparation.
While returning from a fun Sunday outing, Betty wanted to stop at Lucy’s to pick the caramel toffees. Lucy came out to greet her and the helper gave the toffees to Betty and went off. But something was not right and Betty didn’t have a clue. Gleefully she went on and on about her Sunday and she asked Lucy if her mom was available so that she can remind her about the anniversary celebrations but Lucy didn’t seems to like the idea and suggested Betty to ring her up tomorrow and remind her. Since Lucy was in a bad mood, Betty though it must have been work stress. Hours passed and Betty’s phone began to ring and it was Lucy’s helper weeping and wailing. Apparently Lucy had screamed at her for making caramel toffees for Betty and had been nasty towards the helper the whole day. When Betty heard about what happened she felt upset and hurt about the fact that her best friend acted in such cruel way. Mostly she felt disappointed about the fact that she did not recognize that side of Lucy.
When Scott returned home from his business trip Betty poured her sadness out in tears. Scott understood situation and explained to Betty saying it’s mostly because of the ego and advised her to send a messaging saying she’s sorry for what happened and to forgive her best friend for the caused hurt. But Betty didn’t want to communicate with Lucy. But Scott knew, gradually Betty will find the heart to forgive Lucy but was not sure if the cracked friendship will mend.

Men are NOT responsible for violence against women

“My opinion is that nobody can make men responsible for the violence against women. Women are responsible for it, “says the Speaker Chamal Rajapaksa, who is the eldest brother of the current Sri Lankan President at an event organized by the parliament to celebrate women’s day 2014.

https://www.srilankamirror.com/news/13809-men-are-not-responsible-for-violence-against-women-speaker

I travel to work daily by public transport and have a 15-20 minute walk from home to the bus stop and bus stop to office. During my daily travel, I’ve been whistled at, groped, touched, leaned on, and stared at. It’s such torture to travel in situations like that but do I have a choice? And it’s so much of mental stress. For the perverts in my island, it doesn’t matter how decently you’ve dressed, they’ll continue with the sick things they do. This is disappointing. The people who are committed to protect you turn in to monsters and the police department itself is not safe place for a girl/ woman to plead for help. Trust me I’ve been there.

http://yasasmin.blogspot.com/2014/03/is-it-crime-to-slap-speaker-till-he.html

For some reason, Sri Lankan’s are afraid to speak up, including me.

Cheese Ball of my life

07032014189Happiness and love blossomed once again in my heart when I wished the Cheese Ball of my life A Happy Birthday at 12:10am today and called him at 10am after one months of pure silence. Things between us have been on and off and I was reactant to give in because of my pride issues. But feelings for him kept on growing and growing and I kept on bottling them and stored it away. We hardly spoke nor met and he got busier with election campaign. I kept on getting disappointed because he could not make time for me and began to drift away gentle toward someone else who declared their love and attention towards me. I dated the other, for less than 3 months and he was very much in touch with me compared to Cheese Ball but Feelings towards him never changed. Feelings kept on growing and growing and I kept on bottling them and tossing them aside. But a thin tiny voice within me kept on saying, “the boy who spends time with you is not right” I disregarded at that time but eventually learnt that his not the one. In the midst of all scrambled emotions I let him go because he lied to me and didn’t give him a second chance.
Cheese Ball is a few years younger than I. Our age difference and the lack of time he gave me was the main reason why I pushed him away. Amidst all of that I continued to have feelings for him. When I’m with him or know that his in my life, I feel powerful and strong. Today, 11th March 2014 on the day of his birth, our relationship was reborn. When I called, he said he wants to see me, so I quickly ran to the best bakery and bough a cupcake and a card. We greeted each other with a warm hug and I gave him the cupcake and the card with much love.
I’ve decided to love him with patience, tolerance and more understanding. I’ll never know how the future will go but all I can do is hope for the best with the Cheese Ball if my life . . .

Lonely walk

ertert

Depression . . .  something we all go through at one point.
For a while I have been living in that point.
Not having the nerve to face life’s difficult turns.
“Just take this life away. Take it all”
I yell looking at the clear morning sky.
As I yell “Take it all” warm tears starts to gush out from my eyes.
Weary of this lonely walk.
Wearied by been walked away, when will this end for me?